today i decided to dress up and go out. nothing fancy of course, but i decided to make myself feel better by running the errands i've been avoiding for a while and be productive in that sense. i did my makeup and dressed up like i usually do. this time i was alone, usually i go out with friends and whatnot, but i was alone today. overall it was a good day i'd say. i got mostly what i needed and towards the end i got food (which wasn't really good, but whatever). my money would've been better spent at the treat i wanted, but its okay. going out helps me clear my mind and i do enjoy my alone time from time to time.

my errands were just personal things that i needed, body care and such. right now, i'm in a place where i'm trying to figure out a signature scent and my current scents right now are cherry specifically and most hibiscus flowers. although my body wash is coconut milk and honey, i'm experimenting with different scents. i've gotten compliments on the ones i wear now, so i'm thinking of keeping them for awhile. but i'm still not set on what i like. i did buy a new lotion from a brand i usually don't buy, but it smelled so good i couldn't help myself. doing self care of any kind is hard because i don't know what works for me, but i'm trying. so far i have gotten my dental routine in check, now i need a skin care for both face and body. my face routine is still a work in progress and same with my body, but its still a trial and error.

things i bought today:

• cherry tarte by tru fragrance & beauty llc - marshall's
• hempz plum lotion - marshall's
• ferrero rocher 24 pack (yes i get the 24 pack) - target
• wild fable burgundy dress - target
• patty melt meal with a dr pepper - whataburger

also when i woke up this morning i had forgotten that i shaved off my brows and was jumpscared when i saw the mirror lol. but i felt quite confident throughout the day (we don't talk about how i look like in a camera). of course i had to pair it with a red lip and heavy eyeliner because i love being emo and its my go to look. i'm surprised it even lasted, like yes its supposed to look messy, but the bottom didn't smear like it usually does, yk? anyways, it was a pretty good day i'd say :p.

overall today has been a pretty productive day. i decided to actually clean up my mess because i wanted to think clearer and i have succeeded so far. i've made more changes to my site and so far its coming along pretty nice. its not where i want it to be, but i am progressing so much and it makes me happy. besides that, i've been pretty down ngl and it sucks that i hate my job. but i'm putting a lot of time and effort into this specific project in order to expand the ones i want/need to do. it'll eventually make sense, but for now this site will have to do.

on another note, i'm slowly forcing myself into the routine i have been neglecting for like 3 weeks maybe. its bad that i've been ignoring my basic needs and i know i need to get back into it, i've just been so tired from work. negelcting my hunger also makes it worse ngl (part of my routines has to do with eating) and i just can't keep up. my job is draining and its not what i wanna do, yet i haven't done any real projects besides this. hell, i haven't even sat down to watch anime because i've been too focused on this project. and i won't stop until i get to where i need to be. but i for sure need to be better about my habits though. i can't let anything get past me. this isn't exactly "getting myself together" of me if i keep ignoring literally everything. i even stopped journaling and i've been a mess since then i think. life is crazy, time is running and my job drives me insane. i have hope that things will get better, ijust need to put in the effort, but ugh i'm so tired of everything i just cannot :/.

the way i've added other entries, but i keep forgetting to make copies and they disappear every time i change my theme. anyways, i have made better changes (imo) and i think i finally found a theme i like! i was finally able to add a menu bar and i'm so excited because its coming along very well. i'm thinking of adding like silly linkes or something, i wanna make it more interactive.

eventually i wanna make the windows themselves interactive. my original plan was to make them expand and stuff, but i'm not exactly the savy yet, so that's gonna have to wait. eventually my vision will make sense though.

i'll probably add an actual entry thing later, but this will work for now.

but on another note, i have actually made so much progress in such little time and i'm very happy about it. I can't wait to see the final outcome for this website. this is by far my favorite project and i'm actually proud of it because i have manually coded most of it.

i need to get my projects in check before posting them.